Music Blogs

Fame, fame fatal fame. It really can play hideous tricks on one's brain. As the legions of regular readers to these pages will know, your correspondent has a thing about celebrity, particularly a malfunctioning one, madness pissing all over the show. Eventually I will perhaps discover a new obsession, such as corrupt politicians or gardening. But until then Famethrowa couldn't let the latest chapter in Michael Jackson's interminable fantasy life slide without passing comment. Last month, the near mythical, out-for-the-count pop don was reported to be making yet another invisible comeback at the "American Idol" finale.

It didn't happen. Jacko supposedly cancelled last minute, fearing a backlash from the crowd and the wider world. Somehow I doubt it would have been his presence that upset the thirty million viewers (although it's possible, all things considered), rather his creaking horror display. Where once he was king, now he is pantomime horse. Where once he was beautiful, now his face mirrors a damaged life. And yet still the rumours persist, talk of a Simon Fuller-aided comeback, a glittering, Elvis-besting Vegas marathon, complete with ginormous metal robot Jacko charging through the desert, a towering example of his unstoppable fame.

This is yet more baloney. Promoter Jack Wishna, who oversaw Celine Dion's desert extravaganza, spelt it out for real on Friday, explaining. "Michael's incapable of keeping promises, because he hasn't got the will to even show up anywhere, much less get himself into shape for a world-class performance. He might drop by to wave at guests, or do a dance on top of a limo, but a long-term show? That dream will never come true, I'm afraid". That's because he's finished, so let us count the ways, to be sure.

The never released 9/11 song. That star-studded Hurricane Katrina tribute track. The long-mooted mammoth 02 residency in London. A new album, starring will.i.am, Kanye West etc, all of whom did appear on the dismal "Thriller" anniversary remixes, which tarnished a reputation already blackened by paedophile allegations and court cases. None of this stuff ever happens. The PR machine is still in operation but there is nothing to promote. This weekend, two unknown dancers on "Britain's Got Talent" delivered a show-stopping example of Michael Jackson's long-since deserted, bravura skills. You'd be better of watching that. Or this:



Today's Famethrowa's

New: Sigur Ros "Gobbledigook"
Old: De La Soul "Eye Know"